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Monster Fighting 101: The Creature from the Black Lagoon


So it you run into this big old fishy guy here are some tips.

1-Distance as in keeps yours from his. He’s a strong dude and can rip flesh with those claws.
2-He’s a fish dude so don’t think you can out swim him. If you go in the water after him (for some ungodly reason) you better have a weapon and a helper or two. He’s is in his natural element there.
3-He can be on land and can be strong for a while, but only for limited periods. So use that to your advantage if you run into him on land. Keep your distance and try to observe if he’s gasping or not for being out of the water too long. If he is it may be time to strike if you have a good weapon and/or some help.
4-Knock out powder that some crazy old sea captain uses to konk out fish apparently works on the creature if you use large amounts. So pick up a big canister of fish zonker or whatever the next time you are Trader Joes or whatever store you go to.
5-Being alone when the creature is around is a big no-no. Travel in groups and be prepared to shove the other person in front of you and say “take them first” when the creature comes.
6-If a woman in a soaked evening dress is laying on the beach it’s not a gift from the heavens. So don’t go checking on her close because the creature will pop up and either toss you nose first into a tree or just crush your skull like a peanut shell.
7-A gun with a good range and a strong flashlight or something even brighter seem to work best for bringing this dude down if he’s out in the water.
8-Oh and don’t change him into an air breather because he really hates that.

There you go, hope those helped.


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