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Planet of the vampires


planet of the vampires


Oh, yes we are the height of space age fashion.


So these poorly dubbed people  strangely land on this planet after losing contact with another ship. They try to kill each other and then snap out of it. They are on this foggy planet yet they still spot the missing ship. So they add motorcycle helmets onto their leather suit, grab some big caulk guns and head off to the other craft. There they find dead people and everyone seems to have killed everyone else. So they wrap the bodies in plastic and bury them under metal doors in shallow graves-weird. There some more poorly dubbed yammering and woman showing off poofy wigs. Dead crew members rise up and scare the living-awhoooooo. The captain and Sonya (the redhead) are special as they put on orange leather suits and explore an ancient ship. There they find big skeletons and something that seems to work like a really painful joybuzzer. Meanwhile two dead guys trying not to act like dead guys full the living crewmembers into thinking they are alive and board their ship. They steal this vital part from the ship and leave, but are found out and it’s revealed they are actually ancient aliens who caused these humanoids to kill each other and then took over the bodies-ew take that. The Captain and Sonya go after the stolen part, more living people die and there is  battle out on the foggy planet. The Captain and Sonya return with the part and install it. They and Wess are the only ones left so they take off. All is wonderful and the good have triumphed over evil. Take that, you good for nothing…wait, what’s that? You say the Captain and Sonja were actually killed getting the part? And they are really controlled by ancient aliens too? Oh man poor Wess is in for it now. So hoping to stop the aliens he disable the device that turns away meteors from the ship-only he has to kill himself to do it -aieeeeee I am dead for real. The aliens/captain and Sonya say oh well now we’ll have to land on the nearest planet which happens to be earth! Oh, yowzers, the surprise, the twist, eh roll the credits.

The negatives-Despite the title the creatures here are more like zombies than vampires. The plot kind of goes somewhere, but it’s also a bit messy at times.

The positives-I like the outfits a lot, not practical perhaps, but they look cool. The ship and the planet are very cool, much like a 30’s or 40’s pulp cover come to life. While the story isn’t fantastic, the suspense and the feelings of being trapped on a planet with a real threat help make this film worth watching. Definitely worth checking out.




And they say that the Grinch’s heart grew three times that day-ew don’t show us!



Hey look Gilligan is still stuck on that island.


About markmc2012

I have watched far too many horror and sc-fi shows in my life. Now I feel the need to share this wealth of knowledge and make others suffer.

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