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Dawn of the planet of the apes

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2014

First of all who is this Dawn and what is she doing hanging around with these monkeys? Oh hold on it’s not a person but rather it’s refer to the start of something. Oh that makes a little more sense. Caesar the chimp who could speak left the city in the last film with followers and set up a community out in the woods a little ways from San Francisco. Meanwhile a virus broke out amongst the humans and wiped out a bunch of them. Thank goodness there were too many of those people hanging out eating fast food and watching their crappy reality shows oh wait I’m a people er..person. Back to the monkey movie. The rotten old humans want electricity to do important things like play video games and light up Christmas displays so they need to get this dam up and running. Unfortunately to get to it they have to follow the yellow brick road go through monkey land. They get permission from Caesar the leader, but other monkeys aren’t trusting of the humans. The likable humans Malcolm, Ellie and some of the others start to get along with the monkeys, but one jackass brought a gun when he was told not to so Caesar tells them to hurry their rear ends up and get the heck out. Koba hates the humans and when he learns they have guns he starts trouble. Which involves killings a couple of dopey humans, shooting Caesar and starting a war on the people in San Francisco-how about that for a bad apple or monkey? The enraged ape army starts beating the humans. Back in the woods Caesar didn’t die and Malcolm and the others find and mend him. Back in the city Koba is acting like a real not so nice kind of critter-forcing humans to obey, growling, killing apes that don’t agree with him and I’ll bet he smells real bad too. Caesar gets his followers back and confronts Koba so they fight. Meanwhile ape doubter Dreyfus (Gary Oldman) blows up this tower thinking it will hurt the apes and save the humans. Instead it kind of hurts everyone. The apes fight goes on -whack, smack ooahooahooh-and Caesar gets the upper hand. Koba needs help to not fall, but Caesar realizes Koba is just no darn good and let’s him die. Caesar tells Malcolm he’s a good egg or something, but Malcolm warns him that soldiers from the north are on their way and Caesar should leave so as to set up for another sequel. Roll those credits and hide your bananas.

The negatives-

Old fans will say-They used CGI instead of rubber masks, I’m outraged.

Young fans will say-Wait, they made Planet of the apes movies before Tim Burton’s crapfest?

Really old fans will say-It’s nap time, ain’t got no time picture shows!

Really young fans will say-Googoogaagaa

Nitpickers will say-Why isn’t everything absolutely correct by what we know because after all this a science fiction movie?

Oh guess those aren’t negatives, but it did fill up some space.

The positives-As a fan of the original series of films I say to the people that made this film I say “thank you”. You did the franchise justice, added a great new chapter and even topped the previous film which was solid. I read lots of gripes about science holes and such, but I say get over yourself this was a great movie.

8 responses to “Dawn of the planet of the apes

  1. Haha, loved ‘Dawn’ went (ahem) ‘ape’ for it! Great film, they have indeed done justice to the franchise and complements the originals perfectly!

  2. Pingback: My THREE Year Bloggiversary! Thanks to my co-bloggers! And followers | parlor of horror

  3. Abbi ⋅

    Still laughing about Dawn hanging out with the apes.

  4. Pingback: Parlor of Horror 5th Year anniversary | parlor of horror

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